What can I do? (poem)

Write poems? Songs? Draw? Share your creative visions here.
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Skinwalker
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What can I do? (poem)

Unread postby Skinwalker » 14 Jun 2012 09:10

A guy in my drivers ed class knew I liked to write poetry so he asked me to right a love poem for a girl. Little did I knew she was my best friend. I hope you like it.

What Can I Do?
The sun just smiles
Oh, it can be seen for miles.
I love the way you make me feel
lets make another deal.
I steal your heart and you steal mine,
is this finally my sign?
The music flows from our minds,
your being is my binds.
I'm a pitiful being here alone
my heart broken just like a bone.
How can I breath without you by me,
you were everything, without you I can't see.
I love you too much to breath
but, oh, you've lost me once again.


Lose your pride, lose your patience, lose your mind. But whatever the case may be, NEVER LOSE HOPE!
SMILE!!! Let everyone know you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday
Sometimes what holds you together & what tears you apart are the SAME things!

Shows so far (Just starting): 5/4/2013

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chandra
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Re: What can I do? (poem)

Unread postby chandra » 25 Jul 2012 14:55

that sounds awesome :smile:




Feel free to come hang out with me on the book of faces: http://www.facebook.com/chandra.sylvio

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Skinwalker
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Re: What can I do? (poem)

Unread postby Skinwalker » 28 Jul 2012 08:54

Thanks I'm trying to put it into a song that I'm writing but it keeps making it sound like a ballad...


Lose your pride, lose your patience, lose your mind. But whatever the case may be, NEVER LOSE HOPE!
SMILE!!! Let everyone know you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday
Sometimes what holds you together & what tears you apart are the SAME things!

Shows so far (Just starting): 5/4/2013

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sh4ms
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Re: What can I do? (poem)

Unread postby sh4ms » 06 Aug 2012 11:18

Good job! Yeah, love songs tend to become a bit mellow. Mellow's nice though :smile:




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